Claiming a Calling

12/11/2019

To answer a call is to reject the authority of credentials, of human valuation of any kind, accepting only the authority of the call itself. ~ Kathleen Norris

There’s a lot of mystery and cachet around the term “calling.” Everyone wants to find theirs, but no one can tell you exactly how to go about it! Sometimes you can even back into one by doing all the wrong things first, which is what happened to me.

This story started two years ago, when I unwisely signed up for a pricey online course that was supposed to help me “make it work” in my coaching business. Within a couple of weeks I knew it was not for me – I honestly couldn’t bring myself to use the sales-y language and calculated strategies that were being taught. It was an expensive mistake!

Worse, the experience led to crisis of confidence in the overall direction I was going. I didn’t feel like a typical success-oriented life coach. I hated focusing on (or even caring about) how many people signed up for my blog, how many books I sold, or how much coaching I did. Gradually my inspiration to write dried up and, as I said in my last post, I seriously considered stopping altogether.

What I realize now is that learning what I didn’t want actually forced me to confront what I did want with all my heart. The thing is, I’ve been afraid to call myself what I really am – a spiritual coach. First of all, it seemed arrogant. Who am I to coach someone’s spiritual life? Secondly, I was afraid of losing people in droves – both traditional Christians and the ones on the opposite end of the spectrum. I admit: it always feels like a personal rejection when people unsubscribe, even though I know it’s for the best.

Because when we try to be all things to all people, we aren’t really there for our real tribe (or, most importantly, for ourselves).

Some of you – the ones who are already in the tribe – are probably wondering what I’m even talking about. We’re already on the same page. Some of you will be offended by my outside-the-box spirituality, and some will just be bored. That’s okay too.

I’m excited to be writing a new book (estimated for next summer), and am fired up to embrace my calling as a spiritual coach. This is what I think and live and breathe 24/7 anyway, so finally admitting that I don’t really care about the all-important “bottom line,” in comparison to authenticity and inspiration, is incredibly freeing. Sometimes you have to go in the wrong direction for a while in order to recognize the right one.

5 Comments

Greta

12/12/2019 04:12:59 am

I am so happy for you and I can relate...for many years I served in a profession many refer to as a calling. I charged for my services but wished I could afford to provide services at no cost. When i was young, I thought I needed to build the business, and did those things that were suggested at the time to that end. As I matured, I realized that I could provide services, charge a fair price, and make enough money to live in the lifestyle I was familiar with. In other words, enough was enough.... I didn't need more...I just needed enough. I did my very best for my clients and that in itself was a very great reward.
I wish you joy and peace always.

Angela

12/12/2019 04:32:33 am

It's one thing to recognize when you've gone in the wrong direction. Valuable knowledge gained about yourself, yes. But when you feel you are not going in any particular direction, that's the hard part. Some choices are fine just not great. Wanting certainty and conviction, knowing your choices are best for yourself and others... I am 68 and hopeful to make sense of my journey, what has happened so far and what is yet to come. Perhaps my questing is fortunate. I would rather have hard won self knowledge than not.

Amaya

12/16/2019 10:16:37 am

Angela, I definitely relate to that feeling of "not going anywhere." As you can see from my recent posts, I'm only recently emerging from a long period of experiencing just that. I'm also familiar with that desire for certainty!!! I love that you see yourself on a "quest" for self-knowledge, because that is the root of the word "question.". In reality, we never do have certainty, but we can always live our questions, as Rilke wrote.

Diana

12/12/2019 01:25:27 pm

I couldn't agree more about resisting the Bottom Line mentality. I find that about 80% of the advice I read/see about blogging or coaching or creative work in general is "figure out what the market wants and then shape your niche accordingly." That perspective leaves me confused, tired, and discouraged. I'm with the 20% typified by Austin Kleon who is one of my favorite creative people -- over and over he says create what you want to create, write what you want to read, make work that gives you joy, follow the path that intrigues you and THEN put it out there and see who else might want to join the fun!

Vernetta Stewart

12/16/2019 10:09:27 am

I appreciate your authentic words, and broader perspective of our spiritual/human selves as we make our way through/in life. It's refreshing that you make yourself vulnerable to those of us who care. Many of my friends don't even do that. Good luck on your upcoming book!

Professional Student of Life

Claiming a Calling

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